Man and Woman

Just read the following text to realize how words without understanding can create confusion and chaos.

It is mentioned in Vedas that when a girl reaches puberty and becomes of marriageable age, she is first fornicated by Chandra (the Moon God), then by the Gandharva (Celestial Beings skilled in music and dance) then by Agni (the God of Fire). Finally, she becomes worthy of being consummated by a man (husband).

We would immediately jump to the conclusion that this is demeaning to women. But let us try to understand the real meaning of this. It is necessary to keep the eyes, heart, and mind open while reading Vedic literature, and many a time, the intellect is also put to the test. This indicates that if you delve deeper into it, its unuttered meanings can only be quickly noticed and understood.

All these things are metaphors - A girl reaching puberty means the sexual desires in her have developed. The Mind is the Moon. Therefore, when a girl reaches adolescence, she is first fornicated by the Moon, which means the desires of sexual indulgence first take root in the mind itself. After that, the girl starts liking all things related to men, and her mind starts fantasizing about men. Gandharva, the Celestial Being, is the singer of sweet melodies. Thus, the Gandharva is the Deity of Tones. The idea that the Gandharva fornicates the girl after the Moon means the speech and words ignites sexual desires in the girl. If a man is speaking, the girl wishes to continue listening to him. Eventually, a huge fire of lust slowly builds up inside the girl, and then Agni, the God of Fire, enjoys the girl after the Gandharva. The stimulated fire of lust within her makes her befitting to be mated by a man, and he consummates the lust-filled girl.

If this meaning is not understood properly, then it will result in misfortune because of constricted meaning. That is why it is said that Vedic literature is not recommended to be read by everyone. The one whose perception is fully developed, one who has acquired the ability to comprehend indications or in whom such ability has manifested, only that person can read this; otherwise, there is a likelihood of great disaster.
We have always heard about the penances of the greatest of great sages and seers (performed for many years), having gone in vain with a single loving gaze from the eyes of a beautiful and voluptuous woman. They may not have indulged in inappropriate fun, either out of shame or fear of defamation, but can they boldly state that the mind was tainted or did not produce vile thoughts? A rare exception would be found from those who have enjoyed this erotic essence and will not be distracted by loving gazes from women. Can anyone of us assert with confidence that chatting with a young woman can happen completely dispassionate? The temptation for gold can be overcome, and one can save oneself from it with effort, but it has been proven time and again that a woman's look can lure even luminaries.
When such people, or for that matter, anybody who cast allegations on Krishna of being a pleasure-seeker and debauchery, have even tried to understand that Krishna’s relationship with the gopis lasted only during his childhood. Krishna never again went to the gopis after reaching youth. If his relationships had been full of lust, how much time would it have taken for him to reach Gokul from Mathura? I think those who accuse Krishna are mental adulterers themselves. 


We know that love between man and woman is nothing but the flowing of yin and yang together. And this love can have great spiritual significance. The attraction of man and woman for each other brings them together to flow their latent energies into the stream of love and life. That is why a man feels relaxed with a woman, and a woman feels at ease with a man. Separated and alone, they feel tense and anxious; coming together, they feel as light as feathers, weightless. Why? Because of something in them, some subtle energy has become alive and moving, and as a result, they feel at home and happy.

Sexual desire is a natural attitude. Attractions between women and men are natural and instinctive. In this world, women and men are the Prakriti (Female Creative Energy) and Purush (Source of Consciousness), respectively. Lust is a Godly creation, and there are certain social rules laid down in society so that human beings do not transgress their limits of lustful desires. They have little to do with considerations of virtues and vices. Different nations have diverse ethical standards, and their religious systems are not unanimous concerning relations between men and women. To understand this, one has to read the book Method of Ethics by Spencer. He has given examples of various standards of ethics existing across many countries. One would be appalled and horrified by reading about some of these. For example, in some countries, there are such customs that, if there are guests in the house, a young woman from the household is temporarily gifted to welcome the guests and keep them pleased and contended. The young daughter-in-law of the house is sent to the guest’s bedroom at night to serve him. Is this way of hospitality to the guests followed in developed countries a commendable one?

Further, no matter how much one tries to fuel the appeasement of lust, it fails to satisfy one’s heart, and on the contrary, it intensifies the fire of lust. Very few means of comfort were available 100 years ago compared to what is available to us today. Bullock-carts were the chief mode of transport back then, while today, aeroplanes are frequently used. But can we boldly state that we are less sad today than we were hundred years ago? If our one need is satisfied, another need raises its head. After a certain age, even if the bodily stamina to satisfy lust gets exhausted, the fire of appeasement of desires does not diminish, but in fact, it intensifies. And, the man remains unhappy due to this unquenched thirst. I have read a tale is told of an emperor that when his libido decreased in his old age, he couldn't enjoy sex anymore. Even then, his sexual lust remained so strong that he made beautiful girls stand on each step of the staircase of his palace and climbed the stairs taking support of the breasts of these girls. To summarise, I can only say that to fuel the fire of lust constantly while harbouring bestial thoughts in mind is certainly not the way to attain mental peace.
We will now look at Krishna and his relationship with women in my next article. 
@ Yeshwant Marathe

Leave a comment

Satish Dharap

3 years ago

Well written and nice article. However, personally, I have doubts about the meaning of the vedik verses as explained in your article. I beleive that the values, the ethics etc. differ/change with times as well as place. As we have accepted these as our holy scriptures or accepted them as our god's, try to strech and make the explainations to somehow fit to today's scenario or concepts of ethics or morals or values. Whereas I feel that it is not necessary. We have to understand and accept that these are written in different times and understand these as it is.
In Rigveda, there are yagnya (यज्ञ विधी) given for getting maximum स्त्रीधन, there are यज्ञ विधी for a great harvest in our land compared to all neighbouring lands.
In Mahabharata, Pandava's put Draupadi at stake in dyut. After loosing everything once, Kauravas returned everything to Pandava's.. Pandava's again indulged in dyut and again lost everything. Now, we should accept these things as they are because the times were different, the values, the ethics were different. स्त्री was also being used as commodity. Rejecting offer to play dyut was considered as un-manly. etc. Trying to fit everything in today's values and ethics, we will have to do lot of acrobatics.

I read your articles and like most of these. Here I had some different views and hence mentioned these.

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